Cher cher! Can I go to the loo? Go lah go lah! WHO DID THAT? Cher cher, him! I saw! I suppose it was a lot better than being addressed as ‘cher, but at the time I kept wishing I had ended up in a junior college instead. Ah, I understand now. Ah! It's good to be back home! Ah, the flowers of spring. Boy don't try to front, uh, I Know just, just, what you are, ah, ah. the crowd's oohs and ahs at the fireworks Mother and dad oohed and ahed over Cindy. She was only two months old but already was developing her personality. Blame the Ah-Neh race again, just like what they did to the former president who is now in Canada. some 'ah-neh' stole my hp! not tt i'm a racist but i saw this indian or dunno bhangra walking near me on the way to the mrt stn and din realise tt i lost my hp till i got on the train at jurong east to look for it. Well, the locals who contributed to the current prosperity of Singapore, who sacrificed their most productive years to serve the army, who allowed their kampong homes to be acquired by the government, etc etc, are being slowly sidelined in favor of the foreigners -- ah nehs, ah bengs, ah pinoys and others. My SIL had the POLICE visiting her home bcos of ah neh wash. Apparently the ah neh is an overstayer. And the police track all the ah neh's HP contacts and got to her house. Luckily BIL was clever and said they were enquiring only but never engage ah neh service. But what will happen when these ahnehs flee Singapore when they are asked to do NS? We dont owe the ah neh a career or life here. They come in with their discriminatory practices and think the sinkies owe them these privileges. Oh, and if you hear people refer to "that ah neh", they could be referring to you. It's a derogatory term. Upsize or not? The crew member asked, but the Ah neh still give that blur look, so the crew member decide for him. #“Aiyo! Nearly langgar leh! So scary ah! Alamak! Why you go so fast!” he is heard exclaiming to a companion in his car. “Aiyo! Nearly langgar leh! So scary ah! Alamak! Why you go so fast!” he is heard exclaiming to a companion in his car. Apart from skin colour, I have nothing in common with these Caucasians. To be honest, I have very little in common with the expatriates who live in Singapore either. For a start, most of the ang mohs that live here, particularly the ones from Britain, tend to come from the upper-middle classes. Zhen decided he liked Robert, although the Englishman smiled too much. Perhaps this was the ang mo way. In China, if a man smiled too much he was considered effeminate, but Zhen noticed that Baba Tan was completely at ease with them and laughed and smiled more in their company than when he was with the Chinese. Suyin recognized him immediately—the tall, uncomfortable-looking white man, the ang moh standing guard by the only unoccupied table in the cafe. [H]e attracted the attention of a food vendor and pointed at a pot consisting of different cuts of meat stewed in a dark soy sauce broth, served with flat rice noodles on the side. The food vendors, or hawkers, smiled at each other beatifically while ladling out the hot soup and meat in a bowl. They were probably thinking something on the lines of, "The stupid angmoh doesn't know what he is about to eat!" Angmoh, literally meaning "red hair," is the Hokkien Chinese collective term for Caucasians. With my kind of career and background, I have the best of both worlds. You can't tell me I'm that ang moh who doesn't understand. I'm the Asian who's been through the same challenges, and I would show you how to overcome them. "Ang moh" is still used today with an implicit sense of the cultural power ang mohs wield in postcolonial Singapore, whether we admit it anot. Eh butok lah! Which bastard paotoh to teacher that I carry handphone to school? Now kena confiscate! I saw Gary looking at his textbook during the test. Wanna bao toh him? Don't pao toh me hor! Don’t bao toh me leh! to blur a photograph by moving the camera while taking it to blur a manuscript by handling it while damp Her eyes are blurred with the lightning's glare. Then give this box focus to blur the first one: […] These form elements need to have an onFocus event handler to blur the current focus. Blurring one window and focusing on another window yields the same result of sending the window to the back of the pile. A manual way to blur a text object is to press the Tab key, which advances focus to the next field in order and removes it from the current field . Maccario, it was evident, did not care to take the risk of blundering upon a picket, and a man led them by twisting paths until at last the hacienda rose blackly before them. Appleby could see it dimly, a blur of shadowy buildings with the ridge of roof parapet alone cutting hard and sharp against the clearing sky. The fightback when it came was in the [Roger] Federer fashion: unfussy, filled with classy strokes from the back with perfectly timed interventions at the net that confounded his opponent. The third set passed in a bit of a blur, the fourth, which led to the second tie-break, was the most dramatic of the match. Lest she […] will with her railing set a great blur on mine honesty and good name. In Singapore, there is no choice being one of the world’s twenty smallest countries. Boh pien ah. Eh, if cannot finish the work then bo bian must stay back I have been sleep deprived for the past few days, and a friend who knows about it just sent me an online message: “Notti ah…still don’t sleep.” Bobian , I’m a workaholic… He already paid for my ticket so even if I was busy, boh pien, I would have to go. Wa Lao William Tan, Why you Bo Jio Me to eat Domino’s Pizza? When we asked you for your favourite Singlish Slang, alamak, all the kiasu people rushed to share their favourites! Some won prizes. That could have been you. We hope next time you wouldn’t paiseh and join in the fun. Don’t say we bojio hor. Don’t say we bo jio you to use JIO. Why got free barbecue 'bo jio'? This boy damn act cute, I buay tank. Sorry I really buay tank my eyes are closing, head spinning I need to sleep haha. Lonely mudpie for lonely people. Going to watch Ah Boys to Men at 6:05pm. Really buay tank the loneliness here. Oh well, cheers to a better day ahead. I’m freezing now. I buay tank, I need to go hide in my blanket now. Singapore’s star awards – the most shameless show. Buay tank how they shamelessly give awards to themselves for being the best. Please. If you are the only one running in the race, and you get champion, may I know what’s there to be happy about? Being someone who doesn't understand Hokkien, I catch no ball as to what you say. From the way he described population trend, he may well be right. He mentioned something about expo something function. Boy, we all catch no balls. Ah! I see the problem. Fearless is only semi-literate. In which case, I can understand why he catch no ball. I guess we must ALL show patience to the slow-witted. Infini... what? Sorry, I catch no ball. Again, please. Infinitessimal - small, small winnings, Chin The sense of meaning halal should debated on either symbolic reminder of hygiene also define the level of hygiene to the level of a stomach ache or death that is what make sense! Huh? What kind of English is this? Catch no ball....LOL. THE ‘CATCH NO BALL BUT WILL KEEP TRYING’ AWARD INCEPTION Only the incomparable Christopher Nolan, after reviving the superhero genre, could have had the cojones to convince a tightfisted big movie studio to greenlight a movie as ridiculously convoluted and richly layered as this. And now you cry...go lah...sleep with that old man...for what? Nothing! Totally liak Bo Kiu! Meaning her action was incomprehensible. Catch no ball of what you're talking and saying in your content.  Talking and saying, and writing are different ways of expressions.  They are not the same. I chao keng. I idle. What is pride? That said, going back for reservist training would without a doubt be a pain — digging up all your old gear, your uniform and your dusty field pack once a year is enough to make you wish you chao kenged during your NSF days. I couldn't actually bring myself to chao keng, but though it was only 4 km, that march was one of the tougher evolutions we've done. I would argue that those who 'slack' or 'chao keng' are probably more a threat to our national security than a defaulter who has postponed his NS, but done well while in NS. I'm willing to bet all of us have tried to chao keng our way out of work sometime in the past, myself included. For the longest time, there’s existed the rampant problem of soldiers malingering, or more colloquially “chao keng”, to excuse themselves from training. This has led to the deep-seated mistrust of soldiers who report sick or declare themselves unfit. You might consider it too cheem and arty farty but just pick up any journal on cultural studies and you'll find more cheem and arty farty stuff in them Postmodernist discourse is not cheem. You know what’s cheem? Our CPF is cheem. Scoot from just $8? Chiong Ah! From 11 to 13 July only, grab flights around Asia and Australia from just $8! DON'T SAY GOT GOOD NEWS BO JIO! Aussie dollar sibeh low now, chiong ah! If the general view is declining Coe price because supply increasing steadily, then why chiong to showroom now? Semesteral project still currently ‘gone case’, and I am so prepared to get hell from the teacher tomorrow.. so, I’m already in hell… CHIONG AH!!! These few days really chiong my work like siao! Cos i'm one kind; if i can't finish my work, i won't be able to sleep well at night, no matter is what kind of work. Just as long as it's something i should complete, i must complete. Break time! Our block tests will be starting in 3 days! For those of you who have not been spending much time on studying, IT’S TIME TO START. Can recommend places go chiong/clubbing? Today Friday, my bookout day; Sushi, Or-Luah then buffet; After that go chiong all night When I wake up my wallet damn light-ah Where are you going to chiong tonight? Defcon's fastest chiongster is out!!! Regular partygoers are often referred to as “chiongsters”. You can be sure that all of that above will have been done by a chiongster. We should have a Chiongsters section in HWZ where Chiongsters can chit chat about their favorite places and person. The locals like to say 'someone choot pattern' meaning to say someone is being difficult. Actually, the term seems more Hokkien that Singlish - "chut pattern, liao". Many boyfriends going to chut pattern tonight! A fulfilling relationship is a wondrous thing to have but it does take effort to maintain and that entails the occasional chut pattern. If we really want to talk about people or organisations that chut pattern, one cannot leave The New Paper out. IF DR CHEE SAYS HE IS SECOND WHEN IT COMES TO ‘CHU PATTERN’, NO ONE ELSE WOULD DARE TO CLAIM FIRST. When we say a person ‘chut pattern’, it talks about someone full of antics. These include announcements on, say, duty-free sales Later we'll also be coming around for duty free. If you haven't buy from the airport yet, then you can buy from us lah. All same price, confirm plus chop. 5 basic bro-type handphone addicts you can confirm plus chop find in S'pore Moreover, they don't go for lunch but "Da Bao" and keep working during lunch break. though one thing - can we move the place to bedok instead? all the famous hawker food in katong kind of close at night, but bedok block 85 bak chor mee + sambal stingray + orh luah + aboling only open at night. anyone strongly objects to that? tapao something for me? This isn't meant to shame people, just to kind of remind them that sometimes, little things like take-aways from the canteen aren't always necessary, and that by not da-baoing for a change, we can make a positive contribution to the environment . You impudent muppet, diu lay! You may be able to hoodwink people over in the UK, but not those of us over here. Btw, finally saw fat fat here....wahahaha. Diu nei, plane last time. But I'm like Diu lei sit your ass back down. Diu Lei, koki, can you don't send food link before bed time? “操你老妈啊 !” I shouted in Cantonese. Yes! Hantu! Ghots! Mangroves and snakes! Mong! Stupid! Diu lei loh mo! F ... your mother! That is why it has been chosen; and the name Hantu helps keep people away. Probably like you they fear the devil,” said Ah Cheong, hurling more expletives at his underling before returning back to the house. “Diu lei chau hai ge mo, fuck your smelly mother's cunt,” Spencer said under his breath and belted the bloody skull with his foot, sending splatters of tissue and bone flying around the room. He skips 500 times a day and runs three kilometers a day to chase away his fatty bom bom blues. “My family and friends were quite upset for me when they read it, but I don’t take it seriously,” said the 79kg heavyweight, who told us there were worse disparages like a “Go Home, Fatty Bom Bom” message posted on the Talentime forum. I remember, too, a ditty: "Fatty, fatty bom bom, curi curi jagung; mata-mata tangkap, masuk dalam lokap" (the fat one steals the corn, gets arrested by police and is thrown into the lock-up. I particularly liked: Fatty bom bom, meaning a fat bottomed person. Soon, there were all sorts of derivatives - fatty, fatso, fatty bom bom, Trim and Fit club - so much so that by the time someone reaches adulthood, the term had become a source of deep emotional pain. “Fatty bom bom” refers to an Ah Pui; “bom bom”, as the sound a heavy, wobbling body makes, dramatizes fatness. Who like army. No freedom and NCOs always shout. They have loud voices. They shout only we gabra . In the sports field, the nervous little boy who is drafted into the squad to make up a full team gets all “gabra” when he receives the ball and “cocks up” the match resulting in his team’s defeat. Just poke fun only you gabra.... how to survive like that? Without doubt, gahmen must medically subsidise the lowest 10% of the population. Physics test today was out of the world… Honestly I think I’m going to fail big time… I didn’t know I had to study statics! What’s the point in testing LAST year’s work? Like wtf lawl… So i think I flung that section… GG liao lor… Liverpool GG liao la. Steven Jialat hamstring problem. Dirk Kuyt ankle problem. take west ham win this saturday. GG liao.. I can't get in to my account liao ... Keep say someone inside... Gg liao moi go Malaysia forgot to off my data roaming Den i check singtel app saying 1mb data roaming = $25. wah lau, you damn 'gian peng'. singtel give free, you want to sell. For the benefit of those who do not understand the Hokien dialect, "Gian Png" literally means "hungry for rice" or if I may, "needs more money to survive". The author is a very Gian Peng person always eyeing for promotions, freebies, etc. If you not so gian peng, you no need to wait the 15 minutes... See that auntie / uncle use lame excuse to say like they die die must wait 15 minutes…. Hence, its ill-repute of shoddiness and unreliability, as one is criticised for “half-past six work” or and organisation being labelled as a “half-past six company.” Lately there has been a lot of talk by politicans about our being a “half-past-six” nation. Nah...for such shoddy half past six work...i will stick to my own camera, Tey or Snap-Attack.com! A RESPECTABLE statesman once said if a country surrenders its sovereignty, it may become a half-past-six country. Whatever Mahathir's shortcomings were, he cannot be accused of being a half-past six leader. The problem with Pak Lah […] is that all the kings’ horses and all the kings’ men cannot prove that he is not one. At best, it was just so-so – nothing like what we would cook for ourselves at home. It was not “hiam” enough probably from the lack of ginger or ginger juice and there was insufficient wine. It's ten o'clock already. Is it? I'm feeling tired. Thou shalt not express your shock at the fact that Sharon got off with Brad at the club last night by saying "is it?" A jakun tourist’s worst nightmare…is an idiot who simply cannot see that people want to take photographs & simply stands right in front of the object jakun tourists want to photograph, & lingers around it. Yes, it was one of the many jakun moments I had while in Singapore. And it’s popular foods in Korean culture that apparently so many of our readers are familiar with it all! But of course, we all jakun lah LOL. Sorry so jakun, need to post a picture of my Uber because it looks like a Bentley. I was so jakun with the pen thingy and this happened hehe I feel like a kid. wah lao...... jialat ahhhh you. None of the economists polled expect the economy to contract - be it a technical recession or a real recession - and hit the alamak and jialat ranges. According to his doctors, every minute he had remained unconscious would have added to his life being in danger. "If it were 10 minutes... jialat !" he said. Hey hey two different matters okay? Our SM already paid so why you so kaypoh? My elder sister and mother don’t like me doing this. They would scold me and say I’m kaypoh. The slightest noise eg. me opening an envelope, will have him running up to investigate, being very kaypoh by nature. To get problems rectified, Lim who admits to being a “kaypoh” , would hassle the relevant authorities. I thought through every angle, then Jesus decides to kaypoh and mess everything up. Don't kaypoh so much. Locked door, not allowed to go inside, means don't go—understand? Puay Sim interrupted, clacking her chopsticks decisively over a slice of fried fish. If you don't know them, don't kaypoh, Mum. Teacher mark your paper also kee siao. "He's a kee siao guy," Ridhuan said. that's why many getting kee siao... “Wah piang! I’m shocked, are these Japanese kee siao or what?” said Mrs Elaine Ong, a mother of two from Sungei Kadut. He kena fine of $10. My job application kena rejected. Why are you so kiasi? You won't die from getting a small cut on the finger. If everyone dares to bungee jump, why can't you do the same? Are you kiasi or what? When you are anxious to make the right travel arrangements, you sometimes cannot help but be inquisitive. For those in the travel business, these whines should be a common affair. But when does being "inquisitive" translate into "irritating", or "anxious" into "kiasi" […] Do not be alarmed if you have received this yellow cylinder which looks like a stick of dynamite and even had the word "explosive" on it. Last week, one "kiasi" fellow was so alarmed that he called the police […] No lubang, so teruk. Kiasu cannot lose, Kiasi cannot die; machiam machiam words We also try. Proper English? So lecheh, So correct, so actsy for what? Too often you hear about Singaporeans with the "K syndrome", meaning kiasu , kiasi , kiabor . Apart from the kiasis and kiasus, there are also Singaporeans at the other end of the scale – the healthcare workers who put their lives at risk. The kiasi who insist on seeing a doctor for the most minor complaint such as "my baby sneezed this morning leh". No wonder the parents acted that way, she said. They were just being kia-su. The kia-si/kia-su attitude of the Totalisator Boards in Malaysia and Singapore is deplorable. We often see a bus with commuters practically spilling out of the front door and crowding at the exit door. But beyond that, a vacuum prevails, says a reader. The kia-su attitude is the reason for this, says the reader, and most of the culprits are students from secondary schools and junior colleges. The story now going around is that the distributors of Suzuki cars will take over the failed distributorship of Korea's Kia cars. According to one wag, the new distributorship could call itself "Kia-Su Motors". For the uninitiated, kiasu means "afraid to lose" in the Hokkien dialect. No lubang, so teruk. So, Singaporeans, don't conform to what society labels you to be. Be kiasu in making a difference! Shell's FuelSave saw Singaporeans' kiasu spirit come to the fore. I noted that most vehicles in the queue had their engines in idle and air-conditioners on, hence releasing air pollutants. Whenever I meet Meng Seng, he is always trying to sell me his koyok and recruit me into his Party. “I'm here to sell my koyok,” laughed Olivia Lum as she took to the stage and began her presentation on Hyflux Limited, it turned out that the koyok was not some sales pitch trying to sell ice to Eskimos. This is the reason why I get so uptight, so aggressive when someone comes along, talks very well, but sells koyok and puts our country in danger. I noticed standards here are super duper laoya. I tried their sample cleanser, my face was popping pimples like mad and their nail polish, so laoya! So I thought their products very lousy...